Keeping it real

I'm a little frustrated right now! I promise I'm not bi-polar even though it seems like I am. I'm just keeping it real.

I wish I was perfect and I wish everything I did in life I did perfectly.

I wish I was the perfect wife.
I wish I was the perfect mom.
I wish I was the perfect friend.
I wish I was the perfect daughter.
I wish my house was perfect.
I wish my body was perfect.
I wish my face was perfect.
I wish my hair was perfect.
I wish I sewed perfect.
I wish every picture was a perfect picture.

I wish I was perfect and I wish everything I did in life I did perfectly.

Nothing in my life ever came easy to me but yet I've always demanded perfection. I ended up walking away from so many things. I'm a total nerd and say way too much...1 am and cookie dough is not the brightest idea.

What exactly is perfect and why do I keep comparing myself to it? Anyone know what perfect is? Who knows...but I sure get super frustrated trying to live up to this expectation that I'm not sure what it even is. I'm starting to tyumble (mumble but the typing version) I better hit the sack pronto!

Here's a shout out to all those blogs that keep it real! Hands down those are the best blog posts around..thanks ladies for giving me the courage to "keep it real" and not try to be what I'm not....perfect!

What I learned....

I thought about doing a dead elephant but that is so sad...so here's a happy one instead
I learned a lot in one day.....

1. Never post or make any big decisions when you are feeling like a "guilty Gale" or a "Debbie downer".
2. Friends are so much cooler starts at an early age...way TOO early!
3. Life without texting/cell phones seems almost impossible
4. There isn't A LOT of options when playing with an 8 month old. (although this has to be the best age ever...I love every minute of it!)
5. Always try it out before committing to the plan.
6. Never go too extreme (no cooking, cleaning..eek)
7. I clearly have a more severe case of ADD then I thought
8. I still sound like a dead Elephant when attempting to make sound effects. (I rule at setting up a Star wars love scene though :))
9. A house really can get THAT dirty, THAT fast!
10. Cherish the time my kids want/ask me to play with them.

Well ladies my freaky fun Friday didn't go as well as I had planned. When I picked up the little man I was super excited! I'd had my time on the computer...talked on the phone...spent time with lil sis (when she was awake) I was committed! We walked in the door and I announced to the little man how excited I was and that this was our special day.

"What do you want to do little man? Its our special day, we can do whatever you want!"

"I wanna play with Owen Richards" (he calls Owen Johnson this) Or what about Kimball, or Isaac&Samuel"

"Oh I was hoping to have our special day where you get to play with mama, and we can do whatever you want"

"Oh MAN....BUT MAMA....I want to play with friends" "Real friends...your just my mama!" :(

And just like that Mama was given the shaft. Luckily lil sis car seat came in a huge box which ended up saving our Freaky Fun Friday. We spray painted it silver and turned it into his own little rocket ship. We have yet to decorate it with all the nobbie goodness, that will be our next little activity together. Kids are so awesome!

So Freaky Friday needs to be revised a little. I am thinking its best to stick with one special activity a week. And trying to spend "quality" (without all the interruptions) time with them everyday. Its still a work in progress and I welcome any suggestions.

Coming out of the closet

Its time to come out of the closet folks...here is my secret. I love Oprah!! There I said it. I do, I love watching her, and think she does a lot of good for this country. I agree she plays the "I beat the odds" card a lot but I admire it and I admire what she has become. I don't enjoy when she has a celebrity on because let's be honest its a lot of booty kissing goodness and I don't think either of them need any more. Wait what was my point...oh right...

The other day I watched the episode when she was doing make-overs for frumpy stuck in the 80' moms, I wear sweats everyday moms, I borrow my kids clothes mom, and every mom in between. They were explaining what to wear in your 30's, 40's, and 50's-60's. Everything they said about what to wear when you are 30 I've been dreading ever since my fateful day in July. Its not to say the ladies didn't look fantastic (don't you wish sometimes you had endless funds to buy all the "right" clothes to look fantastic EVERYDAY...I know...I'm a little bit worldly). I know I need to give up the teenie bopper clothes...especially when I catch a 14 year old wearing the same clothes I am, it just makes me feel OLD. I need style people. I am so fashion gimpy its almost painful.

So on Monday I took her challenge and decided its time...time to let go of my twenties get up and start dressing "age appropriate". I ransacked my closet and let go of "most" of my teenie bopper clothes (did I really wear that unicorn shirt in public, last summer?) leaving me with a huge bag full of "what can I make with this" clothes(Little lady will love this when she's 10...right?).

Now I am supposed to ask my friends what they think my style is? So...huge fan base...could you help a sista out? Let me have it...even if it comes out as "ghetto wanna be stylish, did you seriously wear that in public? girl".

Oh and I won't be offended if anyone wants to turn me into the fashion police because I'm pretty sure I need it...BAD!
*Today is my first freaky fun Friday and I'm already wondering what I signed myself up for...eek I'm a terrible mom.

Stuff..stuff...and...more...stuff

Well I was supposed to post this on Friday but life happens so here it is on Tuesday.
Its been frost central around here lately...here a few I took the other day. Its beautiful...but...bitter!!






What a world we live in today. I am super grateful for the world we live in. How lucky we are to have clean running water, warm houses, fresh food, clean clothes, flushing toilets, the list could go on and on. MOST of the time I am grateful for the new and improved inventions we have Internet, cell phones, email, etc. BUT......

Lately I can't help but think about all the "things" that are put into our lives to make us "busier" then we already are. It seems as if these things we put into our lives take us away from what really matters. I might be off base or maybe I'm a softy but its a feeling I've had and can't seem to kick. Its so easy to get caught up in the Internet blogging, searching, reading, or emailing. Or perhaps its talking on the phone, (or in my case texting like a 14 year old teenager) laundry, cleaning, meals, and crafting/thrifting. There is always something that NEEDS to be done....right?

Maybe I'm just a guilt ridden mom but I feel I am missing the best time of my kids life and filling it with the "busy" stuff instead. No worries I haven't decided to give up all my modern goodness and go live an Amish life (to which I commend those wonderful people for what they do). I've decided I want to create freaky fun Friday instead!! YAY! So my Fridays will now be just for my chillins. When my little man gets home from school its all him and whatever he wants to do/play. When my little lady is awake its all her. I won't be on the computer* or phone(not even text...eek). I won't be cleaning,(woot woot for me) organizing, cooking, or crafting.

I know this will be hard but I have no doubt it will be totally worth it and will probably end up being my most favorite day!!

*My computer rule will only be broken when my lovely MF is on the radio from 5-6.

Its time

Bitter cold w/the warmth of the sun rising

Yesterday I was bummin myself out over everything. You name it I found a way to bum it. This morning I woke up feeling like I might do it all over again...YUCK!! So I decided its time...time to whip out the New Years "I will do it" list. Ever year I write up a big long extensive "I'm clearly going to fail" list only to be disappointed that yet again I didn't accomplish anything on the list. I'm doing it different this time...short...sweet...not "too hard"....I will accomplish it all list.

Here it is folks for your viewing pleasure!

1. Physically exert myself at least 6 days a week (notice I didn't say exercise...running up and down the stairs could be a physical exertion and I'm pretty sure its proven that folding laundry builds some serious muscle mass)
2. De-Junk one item a week(7 days to clean out one drawer..heaven! easy peasie lemon squeezie..as my little man would say)
3. Rise early, lay down early (like the wiggle room I'm creating?)
4. Family meals morning and night w/scrips (this one can be tough at times but I love the way it feels to start together and end together)
5. Take a picture everyday (my kids are beyond sick of the camera so if anyone wants me to come over and snap a shot or two my kids will thank you)
6. Read more, watch less (life without Oprah.Grey's. Law &order. what a sad lot that would be)
7. Freaky fun Friday's (I will explain this on Friday's post :))
8. Expand/fine tune my crafting abilities...be more thrifty and creative (finishing them will be the brutal part)
9. Save more. shop less (with my Gap kids cart filled up...ha)
10. Do more. Dream less (start living my dreams)
11. Less refined sugar(as I eat an Oreo...eek)

As you can see this year I'm going to cut myself some slack and have more realistic goals. I highly suggest this, that way you aren't kickin yourself by March 1st because you still haven't started or already failed multiple things. Happy late New year...now I need to get my booty off this chair and get crackin on my easy peasy lemon squeezie list :).

What's on your list? Anything fun you want to share?

Case of the MONDAYS!!!

What is it about Monday's? Is it just me or are they destine to be mopy? I always seem to feel like this guy (isn't he cute? this was on the beach in Cali)when Monday rolls around. Not really sure why considering I didn't have a rough and tough weekend or anything. You would think it would be a great day since you should be rejuvinated from the weekend but man its a turdtastic day for me. I don't feel like doing ANYTHING, and its for sure a day you will find me in my jammies at 4 (by 4:30 I have to change into jeans, put on a shirt and pick up a few things before MF gets home to discover what a "blob O goodness" I've been that day)lucky to have had a shower. I totally have a case of the MONDAY'S every Monday...anyone have any cures?

She'll knock your socks off!!

Not much to say...isn't she beautiful! As soon as I saw this shot I thought of this song (minus the baby crying..ha ha and the fact that its about a newborn baby)! This is our Hot mama shots clothing designer! We took a few shots in below freezing temps but she was such a sport :).

















This one is MF loved with a little PS action...Which one do you like better?


Sorry Hay don't be mad...you look lovely!! Hope you don't mind :)

What DO I want to be when I grow up?

So here's the skinny! I love being a mom...LOVE IT!! I don't think there is anything more rewarding then being a mom. It is one of the hardest jobs around and I love it. Did I already mention I love being a mom...well I do...but I want to do more. I have an itch ever since I quit working full time to stay home with Joshua. No worries my itch would never include working full time and being away for set hours everyday.

I've tried to decide what my passions are? The problem is I have two things I would love to do.

Drum roll.......I would love to be a personal trainer and I would love to be a photographer.

This might sound total cheese ball and you can tell me honestly if it does but I adore people. I adore working with people, making them happy, capturing moments, possibly changing lives. I feel I've been blessed with the gift of love. I'm not awesome at allowing folks to love me but I can love them easy enough. Both of the above options give me the opportunity to work with people. The question is which one do I dive after? I am leaning more towards photography (hello hot mama shots...babies...kids...families...I love it all) but nowadays it seems like EVERYONE is doing it.

Any thoughts ladies? Anyone want to help a sista out?

Pics all dolled up!

Guess the man friend couldn't stand them as large and raw as they were...so here they are all dolled up! New Years resolution...Learn Photoshop.

My new super duper LOVE!!!

I've always loved taking pictures but now I really love it! I love my camera and what amazing pics it captures and I love giving people moments in their life that mean so much. Here a few pics I've taken of some lovely people, kids, and families. Bare with me...I don't do the Photoshop thing so everything you see here is straight from my camera...I apologize to those who want to make my pics look better...I'll get there one day I promise! Right now I am loving just taking the pics.
















































Ok I am terrible at this blogspot deal! I wish it had a gallery option...does it and I'm just retarded? There are so many more pics I wanted to put up but the files are huge and its not doing what I want it to....sorry this looks so ghetto! AHHHHHH!! Before I throw my computer through the window I better just post! If anyone needs some pics taken I would be happy to practice. There are a few people I am hunting down...you know who you are!

I know all you mamas out there can't wait until I start up my Hot Mama shots!! Its all coming together..I am super excited! Spread the love if you know of anyone that does awesome make-up.

Aliens are real!

So I have had a million thoughts lately so bare with all the posts of my head thinking out loud.



An alien force has taken over my body and mind! I'm not one to believe in flying saucers or alien abductions but I'm pretty sure its the only explanation for what's been happening to me lately. I'm not exactly sure when they "beamed me" up planted a chip in my brain that's been telling me to give working out the big fat bird, sweets are even more tasty then before, and eating healthy sucks the joy out of life, but its working people. I have been on working out/eating healthy "strike" since Thanks for the givens. This is the longest time ever that I haven't done a thing and continued to shove my face full of SUGAR...eek! Even at this moment I should be working out but posting and wasting time reading other blogs seems so much more appealing.

I was hoping the New Year would kick in some desire and I would tell those aliens to eat my workin out booty but alas here I sit Jan 4 every pore closed tight without a sweat bead to be found. Someone help me! I don't think my clothes will hold out much longer.

What happened to my New year fire? Anyone else going through the same problem?