Sometimes I wonder?

what happened to this sweet little guy? Ha he learned to talk :)

Sometimes I wonder? Quite honestly wondering might not be the healthiest thing, for me that is. Seems as if wondering brings more of a negative following then a positive one. I absolutely dream of the day when I can call myself a positive Polly but the truth is I'm more of a negative Nelly...sad but true!

I'm sure if we had a time square like in the olden days where the bad people would stand in the middle and the townsfolk would have rocks to throw at you, or you would wear that sweet scarlet letter telling everyone what a horrible person you are...I would fit that for what I'm about to say! But hey I'm all about being honest.

Sometimes in many moments during some days I wonder exactly why am I a mother? I know, I know slap on my scarlet letter!

Its not that I don't absolutely LOVE being a mother its more when I hear at least 15 times a day what a "meanie" "rudie" "worstis" I am I begin to wonder why exactly am I a mother? Little dude is a good kid but man he is going through a tough spout right now. Anything I do that doesn't follow his every wish I turn into the "worstis, meaniest, rudest mama ever" I try not to let a 5 year old rub on me but let's be honest, it does.

In my defense I've started telling him to go find another sweet mama that let's him do whatever he wants and also let's him eat candy all day every day, oh and beat on his helpless sister. One of these days he might just take me up on it. I'll admit its not the best response but man until they start coming with personal "how to do" manuals I'm at a loss.

I am now trying the tactical approach of "use your words". It seems to be working so far but it makes me feel like a mom that's gone to loon town because she is so overwhelmed with her life, which I'm not. But honestly the fake smile and happy upbeat voice I use when saying "use your words little man and let's try not using the word meanie, rudie, or worsetest" I absolutely know I look the part.

Kids are awesome and I really love being a mom, I sure hope I'm not the only one that feels this way from time to time. Here's hoping that using our words works for everyone.

Sympathizless

Its a new word I made up to describe myself. I hate to admit it but this is how I came up with it!

I'm not sure what it is about men being sick but my man friend as much as I love him is painfully D R A M A T I C when he gets sick. The same SMALL cough the baby had turns into BRUTAL my lungs could collapse at any moment cough. The SMALL stuffy nose the little man had is backed up deeper then the Hoover Dam and he could need breathing treatments at any moment. Its true people, he doesn't say it but I know he thinks...sure hope she has the phone handy in case she needs to dial 911.

This is where I come in and my new word sympathizless. I know this is when I should be loving, holding, and coddling my sweet man friend but I am polar opposite. Every cough, every moan (yes there are constant moans) makes me cringe. The dramatics of it all is just to much, I have no sympathy...eek!

Maybe its because when the lady friend of the house gets sick the show must go on. Just because I am sick doesn't mean the house doesn't need cleaning, dishes need washing, dinner needs making, kids need constant care. My life doesn't stop because I'm sick, just gets slightly more uncomfortable.

Or maybe its because I was number 6 out of 7 kids and if I was sick my parents probably didn't even know or if they did they didn't have time to dote on me so I learned to buck it up! I'm not sure what it is exactly that's made me this way but I am terrible! I would much rather deal with a sick child any day then a sick husband.

You guessed it...man friend is sick...oh and meanest wife of the year just called and I won!

I love you sweet man friend...please get better SOON!!!

In a nut

I am shocked its already July....really? Its amazing how fast time really does fly. My life has been in serious jet mode and I haven't taken the time to write it down...so a few thoughts and my life in a small nut!

The kids are growing up way too fast! Little lady is already over a year and walking/wobbling all over the place. She is starting to talk and says hot (sounds like hhhhhhhaaaaaa, with plenty of throat involved) what's that (blending into a whooshing noise) and of course Dada. Apparently the word mama is pretty much chop liver to her. She has some serious spice and she for sure makes it a spicefest around our house but we are loving her little personality.

Little man is a dang good kid, I honestly couldn't ask for more. He just turned 5! He is super smart, dang cute, and makes us laugh everyday (I'm not partial at all though). He has his moments as every kid does but is a huge help and a real treat to be around. At the moment he is into racing cars off the lounge chair on the deck, playing with friends every moment of the day (playing with mama is already...not cool and not fun...why do kids have to grow up?), and wants to be outside every second of everyday.

As cheesy as this sounds my man friend just keeps getting better and better! Everyday I get to remind myself that he really is the best hub/papa I could ever ask for. He is simply amazing and I am so lucky to have him.

Its official! I have my very own RPM class and I LOVE IT!!! At first I thought it will be nice to get my workout in and get paid (if you can call it that...ha!) but now it has nothing to do with the workout or the money, I'm in love with the people. The opportunity to be a part of their life and hopefully helping them change, for the better! It is so amazing. Its helped me realize I straight up love people, sorry but I do! I am extremely grateful for that quality I've been blessed with.

I am taking pictures like a mad women and I love it. I still get super frustrated with myself because I wanted to be an amazing photographer...yesterday! I finally figured out why I love to take pictures and why I've always wanted to be a photographer. I am the 6th child out of 7, yikers that is a ton of kids...I am dying with 2. Needless to say I don't have very many pictures of me.

I'm not going to lie it makes me really sad and I can't tell you how much I would cherish having pics of when I was little/growing up chilling with my mom/dad/siblings/favorite toys etc. I want to be a part of those cherish memories for that family and give them something they will love and cherish for many years to come. I love being a photographer and I hope I will just keep getting better and better.

My house is a mess, now and pretty much always.

I'm still staying up way too late and waking up way too early.

I decided I don't like having birthday's on same days...too much pressure!

I still have NO will power when it comes to treats

Last but not least...I am so in love with summer!

I'm sure there is plenty I am leaving out but I can't seem to keep my eyeballs open any longer.

Out...

Memorial mix

Its been a long time, super long time. Life is busy, and just gets busier. Good that my life is ever changing and spicy, not so good for the poor little blog...moving on!

I'm not sure where the tradition of going to visit ALL graves came about but I have mixed feelings about it. I've always thought memorial day is a day to remember the ones who have fought and died for our freedoms, like these small little reminders below. Deep down I wish I was only visiting those graves and not ALL graves.

This post is partially a salute to all the men, women, and families that have given up everything so I could be free and partially the sadness at the thought of visiting my sweet little Lucas. I'm selfish what can I say. My heart breaks at the thought of going there. I think about the little guy all the time. I think about how old he would be what he would be doing and the happiness and joy I know he would be bringing to our family. I get the "realness" that he's not here, but there is something about going to his grave that makes it all "too real". When I'm there I just want to scoop him up and hold him, tell him that I love him and wish he was here. I want him to know I haven't forgotten about him even when life gets crazy and it seems like I have.

This weekend I will have a swirl of emotions, most of them being sad. I know I will see him one day and that helps, but I miss him and wish he was here.

It is the
VETERAN,
not the preacher,
who has given us freedom of religion.

It is
the VETERAN,
not the reporter,
who has given us freedom of the press.

It is
the VETERAN,
not the poet,
who has given us freedom of speech.

It is
the VETERAN,
not the campus organizer,
who has given us freedom to assemble.

It is
the VETERAN,
not the lawyer,
who has given us the right to a fair trial.

It is
the VETERAN,
not the politician,
Who has given us the right to vote.

It is the
VETERAN who
salutes the Flag.

Thank you to the men, women, and families that have given everything so that my family and I have the freedoms we do!

Mother's Day goodness

85 year old grandma in junior high

No this post isn't an amazing story of how an old grandma finally graduates from junior high, although that would be pretty amazing and redonkulous (yes it is a word) because junior high clearly doesn't matter.

Back to the point, this post is something totally not "kosher" to talk about but since its just you and me Jamie :) you've heard it all from me so why not?

The girls....oh the girls...they've deflated and if I had enough skin they would be rubbing my upper thigh! I've stopped nursing and its become an unusually sad sight to see. I honestly look like an 85 year old back in junior high (yay for title tie in). I've tried to be okay with super small girls and normally its just life BUT do they have to be unusually SMALL and SAGGY...come on!!

Its embarrassing really embarrassing. I think its "part" of what makes you a woman, MF disagrees of course but I think he's just trying to make me feel better. I do know that I am not "one" of those girls that is fine with indented nips that can't indent because they are too busy rubbing your belly button. Speaking of belly, guess mines holding out for the next munchkin to nestle in.

So here I sit belly hanging over my pants, girls nestling down in China town. Heaven help the person that has to see me naked, sorry MF.

Here's to hoping they make training bras that will fit my ever expanding rib cage.

oh my this is hilarious!! I might just have to order myself up some of these bad boys.

http://videosift.com/video/Sagging-Boobies-Lift-Em-Up-With-Liftys

What's in a name

can't post without a pic...isn't she so dang cute! this was an awesome session!!
So for all my plethora of readers out there I need your opinions, please!

I'm moving forward with this photo thing and I can't for the life of me figure out a blasted name. I know most people use their name since they are the "artist" but let's be honest my name is super long and people start to fall asleep after the Catherine (thank heavens I married a Vinton and not a Christenanson(I promise its a name)). So listed below are a few of the names I am thinking of.

Honest opinions please I promise you won't hurt my feelings! (just know it will have photography at the end...duh)

MCPhoto (MCphotography is already taken...go figure)
MCVinton
Mae Mae (what the kids call me when they can't say the whole dang thing)
MaeVin


More cutesy cheesy below
Salty lemon
MC Zest
Zesty
Sassafrass
Saucey (because I'm creamy)

There you have it! All the "good" ones are already gobbled up. Oh and if you have a super fantastic name pop up in your head spread the love ladies, I'd love to hear it.